I'm Heath Wilcock,
And If You Sign Up For My Email List, Will Waste Your Time.

I'm Heath Wilcock,
And If You Sign Up For My Email List, Will Waste Your Time.

Have A Look For Yourself...

Listen, I'm not hiding anything... 

I will absolutely, unequivocally, unnecessarily adverbily... waste your time 1,000%.

And you'll F*cking love it.

Why do I know this?

Because I know my audience... and I know what they WANT

❌ They do NOT want to be lectured. 

❌ They do NOT want me giving them more copywriting and marketing blah blah they're already receiving from the 30 other marketers they signed up for...

❌ They do NOT want to think about work.

My Audience Wants The Sillies... The Nonsense... The Absurd...

I'm Simply Fulfilling A Demand.

So if you want to waste time, procrastinate, and hear what happens to me on a daily basis (like the real "boisterous" reason I love plantains so much)...

Then guess what, bubsy? My email list is for you

(By the way, we call ourselves "Heathens" and we meet [w/ cloaks] every 3rd Thursday at The Waffle House in Winston-Salem.)

And who knows...

You may just walk away with a few marketing or copywriting strategies you could use in your own business because quite frankly... and what our friend from earlier missed... everything is marketing and sales.

(And if that last part hurt your creative soul, causing you to question everything you're doing with your life... then my list goes doubly for you.)

With that said...

Wanna Chat?

I'm not on any social media channels and I like it that way. 
So if you want to chat (and read my time-wasting emails), then put in your first name and email address below.
DON'T FORGETWhen you sign up, you agree to have a small, strange man email you with whatever comes out of his brain. Some of it is good. Most of it is upsetting.
Heath promises not to sell your email. Unless of course he's being held for ransom. Then yeah, he'll be selling whatever he can...

Heath Has Been Seen Sweating At These Places... 

Heath Has Written His Smelly Copy For These Brands

How To Build A Winning Brand, According To Heathykins:

Cause Ruckus.

I see what everyone else is doing, and then I hop into my 2004 Chevy Aveo and drive in the opposite direction.

I do not blindly steal what other marketers are doing and assume it's working. I analyze and write based on the market's desire

I'm also not boring.

These Brand Builders Worked With Me Because They Wanted "Ruckus"

"I invest millions in traffic, so who I spend my money on for copy means something. Why Heath? His copy works. Full stop. He doesn’t flake or disappear (he’s responsive as hell). He also doesn’t want to lose at anything. Presells, ads, long funnels. He shares in frustration when we have losers like it’s his own cash on the line. 

When it’s time to make a version two, he asks for the data, the control stats, the heat map, and the results, and writes until I’m making money. What more can you want?"

- James Van Elswyk, Geek Out & Symphony Agency
"Heath did a one-hour phone call with me and then produced the best copy I've ever seen. I was truly blown away. The results were stunning. Heath took two or three words for a theme and turned it into a long-form sales page and I was thoroughly impressed. The design was impeccable. The copy was impactful. 

I'm excited to work on so many more projects with Heath. I've hired many people that said they can do copy and funnels and design. So many fall short. Heath goes above and beyond and deserves the world. Heath's the man."

- Josh Elizetxe, Snow Teeth Whitening
"The first time I got real shivers was when Heath sent me his drafts for the brand project we were working on together. That's when I knew my project was alive and it became REAL!"

- Maor Benaim, The Wolf Marketing & NUNC
"Heath does not f*ck around. His copy is on-point, it's direct to the customer, and it guarantees to make sales. What I paid Heath, I made 8 to 12 times over, and I'm still making money from the funnel Heath wrote for me."

- Albert Fernandez, Loophole Millionaire
"Heath is one of the few copywriters that can make a skeptical audience laugh their way into a sale. If your brand needs some personality, look no further."

- Sean Kemp, Digital Life Raft and Expert Copywriter
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Wait...

Whoa... Whoa... 

What are you doing?

Didn't you see the "footer" above?

The "footer" tells you the web page is done...

Agh... great. That's JUUUUUST great.

I can't believe that, you know...

I go and put in A LOT of work to complete a full page of content for you and what do you ask for? More

So, you want MORE Heathykins, huh? 

What?? Am I just your little toy you can wind up and watch cry??

I mean, you clearly saw the footer... and then you had the bright idea to just bust right past it and keep scrolling. Unreal. 

WELL...!

I guess if you're here, I might as well give you more.

FINE! Have it your way...